Joke thread! Medically related only please!
False
General
Joke thread! Medically related only please!
Discuss non-medical topics
Nothing like a joke thread! I won't ask that you keep the jokes 'clean' - so many good medical ones aren't. But with some relation to medicine, please! So: An old man needed high risk surgery. His so
7
Cat:OffDutyForum:General
Cat:OffDutyForum:GeneralDiscussion:f9ed354e-6604-4cb8-9f65-ae0ad54a0205
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 11/5/2012 11:33 PM BST
on bmj.com
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: Should we allow wit & wisdom quotes? Denis Skinner, Labour MP for Bolsover and scourge of the Tory Party: "Half the members opposite are Liars!" Mr.Speaker: "Order! Order! The honourable member for Bolsover must withdraw that statement" ('Liar' is an 'unparliamentary' word, that MPS may not use about their opponents) Skinner: "I apologise, Mr.Speaker. Half the members opposite are not liars." John Posted by John D An excellent piece of humor Dr. John D & a good example also! |
|
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 11/5/2012 11:36 PM BST
on bmj.com
|
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: “Doc,” said the young man lying down on the couch, “You’ve got to help me! Every night I have the same horrible dream. I’m lying in bed when all of a sudden five women rush in and start tearing off my clothes.” The psychiatrist nodded, “And what do you do?” “I push them away!” “I see. And what can I do to help you with this?” The patient implored, “Please–break my arms! Posted by SURB An excellent joke Dr. SURB! |
|
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 11/5/2012 11:54 PM BST
on bmj.com
|
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: How can you diagnose prostate hypertrophy in a diabetic? By the flies, sitting on the shoes.... Posted by yoram chaiter A good & simple joke! |
|
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 11/5/2012 11:56 PM BST
on bmj.com
|
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: A busy GP had to go out suddenly and asked the assistant to take over for a short while, When the boss came back, he asked how it had gone? The assistant said, a patient came with fever and I gave paracetamol and and another came with cough and I gave cough linctus, and then a lady came rushing in and got on to the couch and said Doctor, Doctor, please help me , It is 5 years since I saw a man, I am going crazy. So what did you do? I gave Eye drops. Posted by pramila A good but tricky joke! |
|
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 11/5/2012 11:58 PM BST
on bmj.com
|
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress, I keep losing my temper with people. Doctor: Tell me about your problem. Patient: I just did, didn't I, you stupid fool!! Posted by drrathore An excellent piece of humor! |
|
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 11/5/2012 11:59 PM BST
on bmj.com
|
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: "Doctor, which of the two conditions is better: being stupid or bald?" "Of course, stupid." "Why?" "Because the condition is much less apparent from first sight..,." Posted by yoram chaiter A very sensible joke, liked it. |
|
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 12/5/2012 12:01 AM BST
on bmj.com
|
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: -"Doctor, Doctor, I think I've swallowed a pillow." -"How do you feel?" -"A little down in the mouth." Posted by Founex1 A naughty piece of humor, appreciable. |
|
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 12/5/2012 12:03 AM BST
on bmj.com
|
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: An elderly man complains to his wife about feeling a little worse for wear and after a lot of persuasion agrees to go and see a doctor. The doctor checks him out and asks the man to return a few days later for the results. The doctor turns to the patient and says, “I have some good news and some bad news for you. The bad news is that you have terminal cancer, polio and have tested HIV+. But the good news is you also have Alzheimer disease so in about 10 seconds you’ll have completely forgotten about it.” “Ooh good” said the patient. “What was the bad news then?” Posted by drrathore An extraordinary sense of humor! Intelligence piece. |
|
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 12/5/2012 12:07 AM BST
on bmj.com
|
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: A medical student was asked by the ENT Surgeon while teaching, to look at the patient's ear. He looked with the Otoscope and when he was asked, what he saw, He said NAD sir. When the ENT surgeon examined the ear, there was no ear drum even to be seen, and told the student so. He answered, Yes sir, What I said was , No Appreciable drum(NAD). In a busy teaching hospital, The Gynaecologist told a male SHO, He will be made to do a D&C that day, So he was all excited and when he entered the theatre, the Nurse announced, all those for D&C ,please go and urinate and come, the doctor immediately went into the toilet to Urinate. Posted by pramila A nice & extraordinary piece of humor! |
|
|
Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 12/5/2012 12:10 AM BST
on bmj.com
|
|
Posts: 3045
First: 27/3/2012 Last: 20/5/2013 |
In Response to Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!: santa : doctor one of my testis has become blue in colour .. doctor : it has gone bad we have to remove it ........ so it was done after few days he comes back santa : doctor my other testis has also turned blue doctor : ur disesese is spreading very fast, we have to remove it ...... and it was also removed after few days he comes again santa : doctor now my penis has gone blue doctor : ur disease is vary fatal and we have to remove ur penis also and so a prosthetic penis was put in its place after some days he comes again..... santa : doctor now my prosthesis has gone blue also doctor : after scratching his head for a long time .............. hmmmmmm now i know what ur problem is ur underpant is loosing colour.... Posted by abhijit pratap An excellent & typically a medical sort of joke Dr. Abhijit. It reminded me my college days. |
