Joke thread! Medically related only please!
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Joke thread! Medically related only please!
Discuss non-medical topics
Nothing like a joke thread! I won't ask that you keep the jokes 'clean' - so many good medical ones aren't. But with some relation to medicine, please! So: An old man needed high risk surgery. His so
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Cat:OffDutyForum:GeneralDiscussion:f9ed354e-6604-4cb8-9f65-ae0ad54a0205
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Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 8/5/2012 7:09 PM BST
on bmj.com
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Posts: 311
First: 7/5/2009 Last: 2/4/2013 |
Patient: Doctor, you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress, I keep losing my temper with people.
Doctor: Tell me about your problem.
Patient: I just did, didn't I, you stupid fool!! |
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Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 8/5/2012 7:09 PM BST
on bmj.com
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Posts: 1791
First: 7/3/2009 Last: 25/5/2013 |
A villager from Ukraine comes to talk to the doctor about his elderly father. "how is your Dad?" "Doctor, Dad is better. Before he could spit on his chest, now just on his beard.."
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Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 8/5/2012 7:35 PM BST
on bmj.com
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Posts: 1791
First: 7/3/2009 Last: 25/5/2013 |
A patient comes in to see an opthalmologist. "Please sit down and tell me what bothers you with your eyes". The patient starts to undress and drops his pants and underwear. What are you doing sir? I am not a urologist!" "Doctor, don't mess with me. When I pee, my eyes are climbing out of their holes!!"
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Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 8/5/2012 8:07 PM BST
on bmj.com
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Posts: 1791
First: 7/3/2009 Last: 25/5/2013 |
A drunk professor invites in a student for an oral exam. "One student please at the same time" says the professor to what looks to him like the student and the students' double... The drunk student answers: " I came to your colleague, not to you...."
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Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 8/5/2012 8:15 PM BST
on bmj.com
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Posts: 1791
First: 7/3/2009 Last: 25/5/2013 |
A patient was hospitalised for a long time in a psychiatric ward. Now he is finally discharged. "Well, do you finally understand that you are not seeds and there is no huge chicken trying to eat you?" "Of course, doctor". Ten minutes later the patient runs back to the ward out of breath:"A chicken.... a huge chicken...." "But you told us you know you are not seeds and nobody wants to eat you". "Yes, doctor, I know, but does the chicken know??"
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Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 8/5/2012 9:13 PM BST
on bmj.com
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Posts: 1791
First: 7/3/2009 Last: 25/5/2013 |
Three medical students follow an elderly gentelman, walking slowly wide gate. "He must have problems with his hips" says one, the other says "No, he has probably a huge scrotal hernia" the third says " You are wrong, he has a neurological condition". They decide to ask the person and tell him that they are medical students and they would like to know about his problem. "Well, gentelmen, you are all wrong as I was wrong. I thought what I was blowing out was only wind....."
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Re: Joke thread! Medically related only please!
posted at 9/5/2012 12:07 PM BST
on bmj.com
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Posts: 1791
First: 7/3/2009 Last: 25/5/2013 |
The Queen has a meeting with Soviet leader Hruschov. He wants to kiss her hand , but she would rather not have that kiss because he id disqusting. "Oh, please. no need I have an eczema" Hruschov:"We have no problem with it. Tito had haemorrhoids, still we had no problem....."
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